Iran has a more pressing issue than their nuclear program --> their trains have no brakes!

Ta Daaa! - Guess who think he has a genetic construct capable of inserting his gene of interest into the oviducts of a rodent? The cloning process for mouse # 1 may very well be complete - indulge me your excitement, if you will. Pleased am I with the time-table in working out the first stages for this project, hopefully everything else will continue like Iran's nuclear energy program, likened to a locomotive: “We dismantled the rear gear and brakes of the train and threw them away sometime ago.” Umm, thanks, Ahmadinejad , I think I'll fly. Did you resist the urge to relieve Air Tehran of its landing gear at least? Also, and I don't mean any insensitivity by this (do I ever?), but shouldn't Spain find those comments the least bit disturbing? And is Chavez in Venezuela somewhere nodding to himself and beginning the process of cost cutting, you know, maybe disabling the counterclockwise function of oil rig drills? I wish I could stop typing political jokes, but my satire train has no brakes, aaaahhhh!

Since exhaustion is waving its shrouded hand towards me, I shall make this quick:
Today I consumed the Down Under Triad, if you will. Kangaroo, emu, and crocodile, all getting along on my plate and in my mouf. In face, there may have even been gustatory rhythmic gymnastics occuring (digestive interpretive dance, anyone?). None of those creatures of the land of plunging necklines has ever been consumed by yours truly (though I have tried the crocodile's prehistoric cousin, the American alligator). How often is one given the opportunity to eat three things he or she has never before sampled, in the same day? It will probably happen again if I end up taking a trip to Asia, but until then, I think the last time it happened was a combination of pureed peas, carrots, and perhaps pears.
The above neglect of Steve Irwin's principles (don't kill native animals for food.... kill them for sport! (not actually, but the food part was his)) took place at the Victorian Night Market, a festival of food, crafts, and lousy conga drumming. The destination was chosen by the ladies of the lab, who happen to be infatuated with a small cupcake stand at the market. For $4 (Australian, approximately equivalent to the amount Baltimore spends on highway upkeep yearly) you can purchase a baked good from three crazy, excuse me, eccentric ladies with the most gaudy, Alice-in-Wonderland-ish stall at the market. I thought $4 was a bit steep, but they seemed to be a crowd favorite, so I splurged (*snap*, the chocolate orange cupcake was DIVINE! *snap*) They seemed to have every type of cupcake imaginable, complete with flavors "musk" and "rose petal" (no lie). I was looking for the Rocky Mountain Oyster cupcake, but no dice. Admittedly, this bastion of consumerism was a beacon of light in an otherwise desolate warehouse setting, welcoming the hungry and obese alike with its glistening mad-hatter-esque setting. Umm, no, sir, you cannot just get a tub of the frosting and a spoon. Sir! stop eating that man's child!
Finally, and perhaps most importantly, when Ghandi was asked about Western civilization, and responded with his famous, "I think it would be a good idea," I am 100% certain he is talking about Croc's. Never before has an entire group of people embraced a particular type of footwear (except perhaps the dutch and their wooden clogs - plus they would have found them floating had someone failed to plug the dike with his finger). Anyway, the Indian population here apparently has collectively agreed to compromise between bare and shod feet, and to open their minds and their soles to Crocs. I commend this company for cornering the market; now if only Subway would open a DMRC sandwich franchise in India (PS: in doing brief research for this quip, I noticed India has a city named Central Secretariat - a slight lingual diversion from names such as Chawri Bazar and Dwarka; I really hope a cricket tournament opens up in Seabiscuit, Pakistan, sometime soon).

PSS: Should I shave my head? Considering it, no real reason, other than slight boredom.