My hair is growing back too fast...

so my plan to write a letter to Mariah Carey saying I have leukemia and requesting a "special performance" looks like it will go for naught.
Well, if you're one of the tens of ones of people who happen to scour my blog, you have no doubt noticed a dearth of material recently. What can I say, not much blogworthy material has occured to me, and I certainly will not flood the market with diluted product. I've been under serious pressure to perform here in the world of HTML (no thanks to Kim); my gift of eloquence is my bane, "heavy is the crown sorta thing." I'm like all of you, in a way, just trying to keep up with the joneses of world-wide-weblogging. With that in mind, you'll have to forgive my somewhat ramblous attempt at written discourse, here, knowing that I'm trying not to over-write, thus eroding my creativity for the med-school application essays I need to conjure from my mental abyss. As an aside here, you'll be happy to know that I have received the go-ahead to apply from the pre-med advising dept. at hopkins, in the form of what I took to be a very complimentary email. This only serves to bolster my own self-importance, and grants me permission to be a patronizing jerk, responding to said advisor that I will take his advice into consideration. Even I had to take a good long look in the mirror after that electronic (pneumatic?) reply. This is not uncommon, however, because my reflection is always captivating.
I'm hearing more and more reports (here and in the US) of children banned from bringing peanut bearing substances into school for lunch, due to the (albeit slim) likelihood that little timmy's allergy will render him comatose. I think it's safe to say I am sick of such protection of those with a meek immune system (besides, won't they inherit the earth one day anyway? Let me enjoy my damn nuts while my inflammatory response is quelled by my prosperous health). It's called natural selection, people - if being allergic was a beneficial mutation, it would be evolutionarily allowed to perpetuate itself; but it's not, it's a genetic defect slowly being erased from the genome...survival of the fittest. Ok, fine, now that I think about it, we humans do everything we can to protect "interesting" species, and by interesting I mean too weak to survive on their own. My new, generous and empathetic plan: pass legislation deeming those with fatal peanut allergies "endangered," and stick them on a preserve somewhere in, oh, say, the Bikini Atoll, where hopefully the peanut population has been wiped out (are you happy about that destruction, allergicans?). They can mate and breed as they see fit, and, if everything falls into place, germline mutations due to the leftover "research" from the area may even cause a new supermutant strain of peanut allergic "humans" (if they can actually be called homo-sapiens, I doubt it). Until then, PB&J (or fluff, if your parents don't care about you getting fat) for every elementary school child!
Time for a meeting, gotta run, i'll actually write about the land of the plunging necklines next time.